Women… … … I do enjoy the other half of human existence. But when it comes to dating and relationships, why do I only seems to find women who want to be served like they are the Lady of the house from Downton Abbey? I ain’t yo butler!
Gender equality… Yeah right. I lack the features of a model so I don’t ever have women chasing me or giving me their numbers. So most of this is more than likely a rant.
I just finished online dating… I’m done. And women call men shallow. Cheese-n-crackers.
Height, “Adventure”, no details (mystery) and a man willing to bankrupt himself for your entertainment.
That is a one sentence description of the people I found online… relatively speaking it has been the same for offline too. Let me go into detail about all three sections:
1.Height: “must be taller than me”
But wait, that shouldn’t be a big deal. You know what having a height criteria is like. That same thing a guy has for the “fitness” of a woman. To a woman when a guy says he doesn’t want to date a woman that is overweight he is thought of as shallow. Whereas, having a criteria of a mans height isn’t? Shut up, cause it’s the same thing. You’re thinking it’s not but it is. Here is the turning point for that thought. It’s alright to have criteria. The difference between overweight and height is controllable by that person the other is not.
What I mean if a guy is as tall as God made him. He is not as fat as God made him. He did that himself. He or she. So the final point on that I am trying to make is height criteria does not show a lifestyle choice and poor decision making, being overweight does. Therefore having a height criteria is pretty damn stupid and in fact is actually shallow; your essentially taking out a possible romantic, passionate life long love simply because you want him to be taller than you.
Shallow: So I feel I should address this before putting point one to bed. Shallow is very simply defined as “having very little depth.” With that in mind being shallow means (to me and I think most if they really stop to thinking about it) are defining someone based on qualities that are more or less out of their control. Hence the reason height is far more shallow than someones weight. That brings up another talking point of attraction which I will discuss at the end.
This is a pretty simple issue to discuss. If you want a guy who you can go on adventures with. Your telling me you don’t know what you want and you want him to do it all… Since I can’t literately go out and find a dragon to slay or return the one ring. Adventure is a super ambiguous term. I mean unless you mean via a video game or playing DnD, if that is what you mean than I am game for that. And the reason it even get’s a spot in as a talking point is because of how frequently it gets used and by the staggering amount of different people. Not to mention the perverted realm a lot of you ladies have to deal with anyway. “Adventure” takes on a whole new meaning when you throw that dick-shaped spice packet into the mix. “Ain’t nobody got time fo dat” is what I think when i read or hear a woman say they want an adventure buddy or a guy to go on adventures with. Do you mean, “It would be cool to find a guy that I can hang out at a bar with and talk about random stuff or serious stuff and be able to share my life with” ? Cause that sounds a lot better and is not ambiguous at all. I try not to judge but when I see adventure it makes me think you are lazy or possible not very bright. But I throw those thoughts out of my mind cause they are kind of mean and judgmental.
3. a man willing to bankrupt himself for your entertainment.
Here is the simple phrase, “I want a man that will treat me like the queen I am,” or other such nonsense as that. None of this would come up in my adventures (haha) with dating if it was not an absolute reoccurring theme. FYI, that is the proper use of the word adventures because the word has already been defined and is slightly summed up and define in the sentence its’ self. Back on topic. I get it, you want to be treat nicely and taken care of and I want to treat you like that but do you really need to say it? Cause saying it or not saying will not stop a creepy ass hole from coming up to you. It actually gives him ammo to help him get into your pants; he now knows what to say that will make you think of him as decent and that your looking for creepers. Just like carrying a weapon, do you really want the other guy knowing you have a weapon? No you don’t. You are setting a criteria that I am not aware of then faulting me when I dont meet this list I didnt know about. You know what you can expect and it really easy… R-E-S-P-E-C-T. That’s right. But you have to try and see how they respect you with the way they understand respect. “I dont need a man to hold a door open for me” it aint about taking away your freedom and equality as a woman it’s about being respectful and trying to give you part of myself in the form of respect. It’s a little hard to define but the summation is, respect, kindness and humility are easy to give to another person. Your list that is only known to you is not, for obvious reasons.
4. Pursuit and desire
The next phase of that one is the flip side: pursuit and desire. Why is it the mans job to come up to you and ask you out. Why is it that you feel he should pay. Oh but wait you offered to pay and if he says Ok there is something wrong with him… Chill… It’s difference between logic and emotion.
Showing respecting then following through with that respect. But way, didn’t I just talk about letting him show his understanding of respect. I did. This is in conjunction with number three not overwriting it.
I’ll make this one quick. Let go of the traditions and dogma that you have seen from media, friends and family. Pursue if you desire. Don’t let some stigma hold you back. A good man will appreciate it. He may just have a lot on his mind and you would be very welcome. But no you sit back and judge his manliness by his ability to come up to you and do what every other guy has done to you… It doesn’t say ANYTHING about the quality of man and his ability to be a good partner to you if he doesn’t like to approach women. May he is like me and wishes a woman had the ball enough to be different. Show she is above the dogma’s and tradition. That her brain is on a higher level.
5. Attraction: She just not that into you.
Part one: the Basics
Attraction is a pretty simple concept. I don’t need to explain it. Sometimes they are just not attracted to you. I feel I have defensively put a wall(numb) to the lack of attraction i get. I stop caring cause what I have concluded is that I will receive the same nonsense (see points 1 thru 4) all the time from woman so I just ignore it now. If she is attracted she will make her self known. Possibly even step up on her end…
Part two: The higher mind
The higher mind of this a woman that has contemplated the uselessness of the song and dance. Has come to a full stop and leap to thirty thousand feet to the see the bigger picture. Knows what she wants and goes out and get its while still remaining respectful and flexible to his desires as well. They bend together, if they don’t in too many areas then they both move on. But the point is, she is not held back by 1-thru-4. She finds attraction in basic qualities but more so in the advanced qualities. The qualities that breed a good home life, a supportive loving partner over the long term, the qualities of a good parental unit and the over all unity of this potentially new family unit.
The brutal statement of observation:
I context this with; I typed this at the beginning as the frustration that created the entire post. I have edited it to make it into the conclusion you are about to read but the general frustration and anguish is still in the text.
I conclusion is that I am going to have to wait for that good quality girl to date, marry, and possibly have kids. Then she realizes how much an ass he really is and the mistake she made with her life. She then divorces him and her eyes are open to see what a real quality man looks like.
It is not the ideal way I would want it. But it seems statically improbable that it will work out any other way. The millennial generation seems to have breed humans with a lack of discipline or foresight into making decisions that benefit them in the long term rather than the short.
Rant complete. I still have hope… I truly do.